Most Popular Pages—Today

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1. It’s ... It’s ...!— A Linguistic Analysis of the Result of the Python Poll—Pythagorina P. ap Pythonius (18 visits)

It’s ... It’s ...!, A Linguistic Analysis of the Result of the Python Poll. Pythagorina P. ap Pythonius, SpecGram Humour Analyst and Stationery Cupboard Prefect. Well, Pythonarios,1 the results are in! SpecGram’s recent poll of ‘top Monty Python lines ever’2 indicates that the most popular Python line of all time isn’t one of the corkers from The Dead Parrot sketch, isn’t anything Lumberjacky,3 and isn’t even ‘Tungsten carbide drills’ as many of the commentariat were predicting. It is in fact the first line (if line be the right word!) ever uttered in the Pythonic oeuvre: it’s ‘It’s ... [ more ]


2. Lingua Pranca—Ambiguity In Action: A Bawdy Count—Norman C. Stageberg (5 visits)

Ambiguity In Action: A Bawdy Count. Norman C. Stageberg, University of Northern Iowa. One major source of humor is found in the many and various situations of everyday life, both as they occur in actuality and as they are refined and recounted in literature. A second major source of humor is language itself in its many aspects. One of these aspects is ambiguity. This is our subject for today: ambiguity in language and the pranks it plays. First, however, I believe that every gathering of people to pursue a serious subject should have a motto to give direction and purpose to their thoughts. So, I offer as a motto for us on this solemn occasion a sign that I once saw outside a dance hall near Iowa City. It goes like this: Clean ... [ more ] Podcast!


3. Which Tea You Should Be Drinking—A Guide by Linguistic Subdiscipline—Hitosarai Yōkai Ūron (5 visits)

Which Tea You Should Be Drinking, A Guide by Linguistic Subdiscipline. Hitosarai Yōkai Ūron, Senior Research Fellow, Capsule Corporation, West City. The drinking of tea is and always has been an important part of academic linguistics, and the slow but steady decline of armchairs in the global research communityi means this situation will only get worse. It is also now becoming apparent that the new generation of future researchers in our field often struggle immensely with knowing what they are meant to be doing and what signals they send to their established colleagues through simple choices such as the statistical model they use or the variety of tea they drink. While it is rather difficult to help ... [ more ]


4. The Symptoms and Warning Signs of Framework Psychosis—Dr. Pill, M.D. (3 visits)

The Symptoms and Warning Signs of Framework Psychosis. By Dr. Pill, M.D.. Framework Psychosis, a new and dangerous affliction sweeping through academia like wildfire, is the unhealthy (and unfounded) belief that one’s framework, whatever it may be, is the one true framework. As a public service, I have written up a set of guidelines that will allow concerned individuals to identify those suffering from Framework Psychosis. If you are an academic, I encourage you to post this list in your lounges, labs, lecture halls, and latrines. With your help, we may yet be able to eradicate FP in our lifetime. There is no such thing as a framework free of complications. If you believe you subscribe to one, you may be a ... [ more ] Podcast!


5. Speculative Grammarian International Academic and Very Clever Professorial International Linguistics Conference 2020—UPDATE (3 visits)

Speculative Grammarian International Academic and Very Clever Professorial International Linguistics Conference 2020 —UPDATE. University of New Atlantis, 31st–35th; February 2020. There have been a surprising number of early registrants for the SpecGram 2020 conference following our announcement in last month’s issue of SpecGram. The specific number of registrants, eπ/2 + 1, is surprising because it is irrational. Of course, many linguists in general and SpecGram devotees in particular are irrational—but we never expected an irrational number of them to register. Would that be paucal or plural? Subsequent to the revelation ... [ more ]


6. Vol CLII, No 3 (3 visits)

SPECULATIVE GRAMMARIAN, ... Somewhat Obscure Phonetic Symbol Issue ... Volume CLII, Number 3; May 2007, Speculative Grammarian, Vol CLII, No 3, PV = nRT, MANAGING EDITOR, Trey Jones, SENIOR EDITOR, Keith Slater, EDITOR EMERITUS, Tim Pulju, ASSOCIATE EDITORS: Yahya Abdal-Aziz, Clif Armstrong, Adam Baker, Martin Hilpert, Kean Kaufmann, Ken Miner, David J. Peterson, Harris Risman, Bill Spruiell, Mikael Thompson, Jim Unger, Rita Watson, Sheri Wells-Jensen, Joey Whitford, Christopher Wood, ... [ more ]


7. “Double-Dot Wide O / Nasal-Ingressive Voiceless Velar Trill”—by J–––– J––––––—Reviewed by Jonathan van der Meer (3 visits)

“Double-Dot Wide O / Nasal-Ingressive Voiceless Velar Trill” by J–––– J––––––. From Speculative Grammarian CLI.3; July 2006. Reviewed by Jonathan van der Meer. ... Double-Dot Wide O, Spoiler Alert !. It’s been more than eight years, so I’m going to go ahead and let you in on a little secret: the nasal-ingressive voiceless velar trill is a pig snort, and the double-dot wide O looks like a pig snout. (Some phoneticians will argue that they themselves produce a uvular trill. They probably do—especially when reading journals less interesting than SpecGram—but ... [ more ]


8. Optimality Theory Was a Hoax—SpecGram Wire Services (3 visits)

Optimality Theory Was a Hoax, Prince and Smolensky finally come clean . SpecGram Wire Services. At a tearful news conference during the 2013 Annual Meeting of the Linguistic Society of America, Allen Prince confessed that Optimality Theory was a hoax. “I just can’t live with the lies any longer,” he said. The admission follows years of accusations by linguists who doubted that OT actually existed. The drumbeat of suspicions grew louder, but both Prince and his collaborator Paul Smolensky steadfastly maintained not only that they had created OT but that in fact a large number of practicing linguists were employing the theory in their professional work. OT, Prince explained, was originally ... [ more ] Podcast!


9. A Primer in SF Xenolinguistics—Justin B. Rye (3 visits)

A Primer in, SF Xenolinguistics. - eep opp ork ah-ah -, Justin B. Rye. — - ash nazg durbatulûk -, Table of Contents. Fantasy Exotic Tongues—An Introduction, Let’s Speak Alien—In Ten Easy Lessons, The Unspeakable—And The Unthinkable, Universal Translators—A Buyer’s Guide, CETI for Beginners—Little Green Manuals — - borag thungg -, FANTASY EXOTIC TONGUES—An Introduction. If you’ve reached the online version of this article chasing the search-string “ +fantasy +exotic +tongues ” then I’m afraid you’ve probably come to ... [ more ]


10. Why Linguistics is Not a Science—The SpecGram Editorial Board (3 visits)

Why Linguistics is Not a Science. The SpecGram Editorial Board. In a couple of recent editorials we have answered several of the questions most frequently submitted by SpecGram readers. Since the publication of those editorials, by far the most common question received in our offices has been, “Could please furnish us with your bank account number so we can transfer payment to you?” We cannot in good conscience accede to this request, as it violates a number of constraints and therefore suffers from what we like to call “fatal infelicity.” Another frequent question, though, is more worthy of our attention, (though only due to its being fifth on the frequency list) and it is to that more ... [ more ]


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Last updated Jun. 20, 2021.