Most Popular Pages—Today

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1. From Mwahaha to Bwahaha: Some Observations on Evil LaughterLady Esmerelda Rose Beeton-Frasier (9 visits)

From Mwahaha to Bwahaha: Some Observations on Evil Laughter. By Lady Esmerelda Rose Beeton-Frasier. Evil laughter is present across the globe and can be observed in all cultures and languages.1 At first it would appear that “Evil Laughter” or “EL” as it will be referred to, may take on various different phonetic forms, and I propose, after much research2 that EL falls somewhere between “Glee”3 and “Hysterics”.4 EL might start out as Gleeful Laughter (GL), may progress to EL before either ceasing, or escalating rapidly to Hysterical Laughter (HL).5 Those who are well schooled in the art of EL may skip GL and proceed ... more ]

2. On Homeopathic LinguisticsTrent Slater (5 visits)

On Homeopathic Linguistics. Trent Slater. Linguistics has a long history of borrowing from other fields. From importing physics-style diagrams to piggybacking on biology and acoustics and calling it phonology, we have rarely turned down a good theory or methodology. We have even accepted post-structuralism in some quarters. Yet, only very dilute attention has been paid to the blossoming field of Alternative Medicine. A Watered-Down Background. Alternative medicine eschews the machinery of modern science, with its constant recourse to evidence and ethics, and mixes old traditions with innovative ideas. This is much the same process as it takes to apply philology to machine translation or to apply ... more ]

3. Archives (5 visits)

SpecGram Archives. A word from our Senior Archivist, Holger Delbrück: While bringing aging media to the web and hence the world is truly a labor of love, SpecGram tries the passion of even the most ardent admirer. Needless to say, we’ve fallen behind schedule. At every turn, the authors found in the pages of this hallowed journal stretch credibility with their gratuitous font mongeringfirst it was the IPA, then a few non-standard transcription systems, then Greek, and not just the alphabet, but the entire diacritical mess, and now I’ve got some god-forsaken Old Church Slavonic glyph sitting on my desk that no one can even name, and which would give the Unicode Consortium ... more ]

4. Books (4 visits)

SpecGram Books. A number of books and book-like entities (including various monographs) have come into existence in and around Speculative Grammarian over the years. Here we’ve collected links to all of their digital and corporeal manifestations in one place for your convenience. ... The Splendid Words, by James S. Pasto,; January 2019 The tale of a man obsessed, driven by a hunger and thirst to uncoverhe knows not what! Far past reason, he has hunted and hated, been haunted and humiliated. Now his search has borne fruitdiscover whether it is bitter or sweet! Available to read online. ... The History of Rome, by Tim Pulju; July 2018 Speculative ... more ]

5. Virtual NLP Dice (4 visits)

Virtual NLP Dice. The SpecGram Überlinguistaffen. ... [Re-roll.] [Re-roll like you mean it !!] As many successful practitioners of Natural Language Processing know, the surest path to success is to come up with some complicated-looking equation and then rest on your mathematical laurels for the rest of your careerbecause “Math is hard, and hard things are for smart people, and smart people are just better. QED.” Or so we learned from the original ad for NLP Dice: “Local Linguist Mom Discovers One Weird Trick for Deriving NLP Equations!Computational Linguists Hate Her!” (SpecGram ... more ]

6. IPA-to-ILPS Transcriber (4 visits)

IPA-to-ILPS Transcriber. by Daniel Swanson. Type International Phonetic Alphabet* into the input box and get the corresponding Inter-Lingual Personal Script below. Or, handcraft individual consonants and vowels. See “Inter-Lingual Personal Script” (SpecGram CLXXXIX.2) for more information. Scale, Add IPA string Add Consonant Add Vowel — * Suprasegmentals and tones are not currently implemented. Some other parts of the IPA may also not be supported. ... more ]

7. A Love/Hate Relationship: Pesky AntonymsJessie Sams (3 visits)

A Love/Hate Relationship: Pesky Antonyms. Jessie Sams, Stephen F. Austin State University. When students get to college, the majority of them have never thought about antonyms as being anything more than “opposites.” So big is the opposite of small, just like buyer is the opposite of seller. Then, all of a sudden, students are forced into a linguistics course with a professor who tells them that they have to learn to differentiate among different types of antonyms. Student’s minds are nearly exploding with information as they have to learn definitions of terms like ‘converse’ and ‘gradable’ and ‘complementary’ in the world of ... more ]

8. The Speculative Grammarian Essential Guide to Linguistics (3 visits)

The Speculative Grammarian Essential Guide to Linguistics . For decades, Speculative Grammarian has been the premier scholarly journal featuring research in the neglected field of satirical linguisticsand now it is available in book formboth physical and electronic! We wish we were kidding,1 but no, seriously, we’ve published a large3 collection of SpecGram articles, along with just enough new material to force obsessive collectors and fans to buy it, regardless of the cost.4 From the Introduction: The past twenty-five years have witnessed many changes in linguistics, with major developments in linguistic theory, significant expansion ... more ]

9. Thank You, Philosophy of LanguageThe Third Autonomous Bilborough Linguistics Circle (3 visits)

Thank You, Philosophy of Language. Presented by The Third Autonomous Bilborough Linguistics Circle. It’s well known that every student of linguistics, sooner or later, will come to the realisation that however much cross-linguistic data you have, however good your theories are, and however applicable, elegant and parsimonious your analysis is, there’s still something missing from that full-on, no-holds-barred linguistic experience we’re all looking for. And that’s when the Philosophy of Language kicks in. Its vague, speculative and irrelevant nature is matched only by the density of prose in which it is written and the dustiness of the tomes in which it is found. But ah!, that vagarity, ... more ]

10. About Us (3 visits)

Speculative Grammarian and Our Story. The august journal Speculative Grammarian has a long, rich, and varied history, weaving an intricate and subtle tapestry from disparate strands of linguistics, philology, history, politics, science, technology, botany, pharmacokinetics, computer science, the mathematics of humor, basket weaving, archery, glass blowing, roller coaster design, and bowling, among numerous other, less obvious fields. SpecGram, as it is known to devotees and sworn enemies alike, has for centuries sought to bring together the greatest yet least understood minds of the time, embedding itself firmly in the cultural and psychological matrix of the global society while ... more ] Podcast!

11. Linguistics Nerd CampBethany Carlson (3 visits)

Linguistics Nerd Camp. Bethany Carlson. Marty’s long nights doing syntax homework finally catch up with him. ... more ] Book!

12. Personals for Linguists (3 visits)

Personal Ads for Linguistsincluding linguists of every kind seeking romance, academic partnerships, and moreall with that special SpecGram twist. N.B.: Information in personal ads is provided by the submitters. The editors and publishers of Speculative Grammarian are not responsible for their content, including, but not limited to, typos, spelling mistakes, poor grammar, bad judgment, factual errors, bald-faced lies, or lapses in national security ... more ]

13. Vol CXCIII, No 4 (3 visits)

Speculative Grammarian Volume CXCIII, Number 4 Editor-in-Chief: Trey Jones; Executive Editors: Keith Slater, Mikael Thompson; Senior Editors: Jonathan Downie, Deak Kirkham; Contributing Editors: Pete Bleackley, Vincent Fish; Associate Editors: Luca Dinu, Yuval Wigderson, Daniel Swanson; Editorial Associates: Emily Davis, Andrew Lamont, Steve Politzer-Ahles; Comptroller General: Joey Whitford; The Lambda Calculus of Iotacism; April 2024, ... more ]

14. Lingua Pranca (3 visits)

I U Linguistics Club. Lingua Pranca. T. Ernst & E. Smith, Editors. Indiana University. June 1978. ... i u linguistics club, edging edging edging edging edging edging edging edging edging edging edging edging edging edging edging edging edging edging edging edging edging edging, ... Lingua, ... Pranca, ... fleur ... T. Ernst & E. Smith, eds. ... indiana university, ... more ]

15. Quotes: What People are Saying (3 visits)

Quotes: What People are Saying. Here are a few of our favorite things people have said about Speculative Grammarian over the years, collected wild on the internet, or domesticated in email — Q1118. C’est sans doute un humour un peu ésotérique mais bon —Sémioticien du bisou — Q1117. Support the addition of the double-dot wide O to the IPA chart by buying some Speculative Grammarian merchandise! No, I’m not being sponsored or getting a commission from them. I just appreciate good geeky humour —Grace Teng — Q1116. Speculative Grammarian ist die erste Zeitschrift für satirische Linguistik. Kostenlos zugänglich, ein ... more ]

16. Choose Your Own Career in Linguistics (3 visits)

Choose Your Own Career in Linguistics. by Trey Jones. As a service to our young and impressionable readers who are considering pursuing a career in linguistics, Speculative Grammarian is pleased to provide the following Gedankenexperiment to help you understand the possibilities and consequences of doing so. For our old and bitter readers who are too far along in their careers to have any real hope of changing the eventual outcome, we provide the following as a cruel reminder of what might have been. Let the adventure begin ... more ] Book!

17. AutoGrammatikon™ (3 visits)

The Speculative Grammarian Auto­Gram­matikon™ Quasi-Universal Translator℠. On several occasions, mention has been made of the AutoGrammatikon™ Quasi-Universal Translator℠ in the pages of SpecGram; in the current epoch, these references date back as early as at least 2004.1 In the following years there have been denials,2 mentions,3 more4 mentions,5 leaked internal documents,6 and even some early oral history7 (accompanied as it was by additional denials). Throughout this time the consistent official stance of the Editorial board of SpecGram has been to deny that the AutoGrammatikon™ exists, ... more ]

18. The Lost Lexicographer: Ambrose Bierce, Beelzebub, and Documentary LinguisticsBook Announcement from Psammeticus Press (3 visits)

The Lost Lexicographer: Ambrose Bierce, Beelzebub, and Documentary Linguistics , Dee Villes and Dick Shunry, Published 2012. Bitter Bierce, as the author of The Devil’s Dictionary was known to many, was not actually a satirist and horror fiction writer. Rather, he was a genuine lexicographer. Detailed literary analysis of The Devil’s Dictionary, “An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge,” and The Necronomicon reveals that Bierce was, much like later author H.P. Lovecraft, actively engaging in linguistic documentation of certain Beelzebubbian dialects (or, perhaps the larger genus of Chthonic languages), including gathering folk tales for a linguistic anthropological anthology. ... more ]

19. Ministry of Propaganda (3 visits)

The SpecGram Ministry of Propaganda. Welcome to the SpecGram Ministry of Propaganda. The SpecGram Archive Elves™ have undertaken a project to digitize and share a sheaf of early 20th century SpecGram propaganda posters, which were used during the Great Linguistic War and the Second Linguistic War to encourage linguists everywhere to keep a stiff upper lip and a sense of humor during those trying times. We provide the digitized posters here for you to enjoy, retrospect on, and share. Select a poster to see a higher quality image, and for links to share on social media, to email friends, and to view or download the highest quality version of the image. If you have ideas for other messages that need ... more ]

20. The SpecGram Quiz to End All Quizzes (3 visits)

The SpecGram Quiz to End All Quizzes. ... Everyone makes Internet quizzes—even your three richest widowed aunts use their mite, if not their might, to bedazzle the gullible and amass those sweet, sweet clicks. So stand aside, ladies, SpecGram is on the make move! There’s a new quiz powerhouse in town, and since we don’t believe in planned obsolescence, you’ll never need nor want another!, Just answer these 17 handy-dandy mutually orthogonal questions to get the answers to all (or at least the 7 most important) of your burning questions. ... more ]

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Last updated Jun. 23, 2024.