While many today lament the imminent demise of the English language (Hat 2006), the corrupting influence of western culture (Bolson 2014), and the amorality of advertising and the pursuit of the mighty dollar (Board 2010), it is nonetheless clear to the classically educated scholar (Plaid’oh 2009) that, really, there is nothing new under the sun (van der Meer 2013).
A recent excursion into the darkest recesses of the Hall of Lost Philological Manuscripts in the Lukkitha Sizathat Graduate Library on the campus of the Varrie X. Pensive College of the Remunerative Arts has revealed a 13th c. “language enhancement” advertisement, the form of which will be familiar to the modern surfer of internets.
The document, apparently cut from an unknown codex, features an artificially eye-
The restored result is presented below.
Board, The SpecGram Editorial, 2010. “How to Pay for Linguistic Fieldwork,” Speculative Grammarian CLVIII.4.
Bolson, Tennick, 2014. “Unu Mondo, Unu Lingvo, Sen Kulturo,” Speculative Grammarian CLXXI.3.
Hat, Language, 2006. “Letter to the Editor,” Speculative Grammarian CLI.3.
M.A.Y.N.A.R.D., 2015. Personal Communication.
Plaid’oh, Fædrus Ϙ. Χ., 2009. “On Google, Wikipedia, and The Development of The Internet,” Collateral Descendant of Lingua Pranca.
van der Meer, Jonathan, 2013. “A Psychosis of the “Framework Psychosis” Framework,” Speculative Grammarian CLXVIII.3.