Your author has been a frequent visitor to Mongolia since 1987 as part of my organization’s remarkably unsuccessful effort to inculcate the love of cats among a people that so universally fears and loathes them. Nonetheless, I have otherwise come to a great admiration for the country and have been perturbed to see many of the least attractive institutions of western culture take root here: Cosmopolitan, Playboy, Fifty Shades of Grey, and KFC. Unfortunately, even worse lies in wait for the unsuspecting Mongols of today!!! On a recent walk to a business meeting, I happened across the following sign:
There is much talk in the modern world of the dangers of cultural imperialism, but what is less recognized is that the imperialism all of these represent is the opposite of “cultural.” To see this, simply ask yourself this: When was the last time you found a book with the note “Translated from Esperanto”? There is not, never has been, and never shall be such a thing, for Esperanto not only has no culture, it is such a dull and deadening language that its very use prevents culture from taking root. It is, in short, the linguistic equivalent of KFC. Just as Cosmo scrapes off the individuality of every person and forces him or her into one of two molds, the Cosmo male and the Cosmo gal (and it is hard to determine which is a greater affront to human dignity), just as Playboy spray-