A Love/Hate Relationship: Pesky Antonyms—Jessie Sams SpecGram Vol CLIX, No 3 Contents Vallelz Noun Class Word Search Solution—The <i>SpecGram</i> Puzzle Elves

Out-of-this-World Fieldwork Puzzle #1

by Pecha Kucha

Having decided to do some out-of-this world fieldwork, you use your intergalactic tachyon communicator to contact your old friends Snurklifer and Refilkruns, who give you a lift to the planet Glectorsh Hinxdolr IX, where they speak several languages that are not among the 4,675 languages you know.

Snurklifer and Refilkruns have arranged for you to meet the leaders of the Glectorsh and Hinxdolr clans so that you can get permission to do fieldwork on their respective languages. Fortunately, everyone also speaks Galactic Normal Forty-Eight, so you can all communicate relatively well, and Snurklifer and Refilkruns leave.

At the meeting, the Glectorsh leader gives you a Saber-Fanged Semi-Sentient Omnivore, which psychically bonds with you to become your life-long companion and protector. You name it Fluffy because it is actually scaly and you have an acute sense of verbal irony.

The Hinxdolr leader is outraged, and threatens to disallow any and all fieldwork unless the Hinxdolr can also give you a gift of similar value. You agree, but the Glectorsh leader demands to accompany you, along with a pair of Glectorsh warriors. The Hinxdolr leader agrees, but also decides to bring along a pair of warriors.

Everything is going fine as you hike from the central meeting place toward the Hinxdolr capital city. Then you come to a river. There is a sturdy looking raft, but it will only hold 2 beings at a time (you, a Hinxdolr, a Glectorsh, or Fluffy). Fluffy informs you, telepathically, that only the Glectorsh or Hinxdolr leaders are allowed to pilot the raft across the river. Further, if either leader leaves one or both of their warriors with the other leader, the other leader would likely kill the warriors, even if you are present (and Fluffy vows not to get involved). The warriors will not fight amongst themselves if neither of their leaders are present. Also, Fluffy, as your life-long companion and protector, will wait for you on either side of the river, but if you leave it alone with any number of the others, it would be honor-bound to eat all of them. Fluffy could clearly take on all the others with one fang tied behind its back. Fluffy cannot pilot the raft. The good news is that it looks like you could pilot the raft across the river yourself if necessary. (Phooey on those wimpy “warriors”!)

How do you get everyone across in the fewest trips?

If you think you know how to get everyone safely across the river so you can continue your fieldwork, send you solution to the editors of SpecGram by August 15th, 2010. You could win a SpecGram magnet. Our answer, right or wrong, and winners, if any, will be announced in an upcoming issue of Speculative Grammarian.

A Love/Hate Relationship: Pesky Antonyms—Jessie Sams
Vallelz Noun Class Word Search Solution—The SpecGram Puzzle Elves
SpecGram Vol CLIX, No 3 Contents