SpecGram Vol CLII, No 4 Contents Letters to the Editor
Text Tricks

Phonemes я No Longer Phun

A Letter from the Managing Editor

In the last issue, I made the mistake of mistakenly alluding to what I mistook for a new social-scientific grand-unification theory that I had mistakenly overheard, and which I mistakenly thought was known as the “SSGUT” (and mistakenly pronounced /wizl/). It turns out that I made a mistake.

Several regular readers and subscribers asked me to expound upon the theory, as I described it, and I had planned to do so in this space. However, one irregular reader and non-subscriber demanded (in the form of a legal injunction) that I not further describe nor expand upon the theory. It turns out, from a legal point of view, that no such theory exists, and that if it did, discussing it might violate or infringe upon certain copyrights, trademarks, patents, patent applications, and trade secrets belonging to a certain six-foot-five female leprechaun of Iroquoian descent, who may or may not have actually existed before she was fatally run over by the “Morphosyntax for Documentary Linguists” float.

It turns out that she told at least one other person about her theory: her lawyer. I do not believe he understands it, but I do think he believes there is money to be made from it. Clearly, he did not study a social science before attending law school.

On the up side, Linguistics as a whole and SpecGram in particular have become important enough for lawyers to feel the need to interfere to make sure no one makes a measly buck without them getting a hefty percentage. We have arrived, comrades!

Also, please note that this is the very special (or, perhaps, very especially annoying) “Text Tricks” Issue. Clicking on the little rainbow-A in the upper right corner of each page will do terrible, terrible, potentially seizure-inducing things to the typography and layout of the page. And each page is different, too!

That’s all I have this time.

Letters to the Editor
SpecGram Vol CLII, No 4 Contents