/nuz baɪts/ SpecGram Vol CXCII, No 4 Contents Good Ol’ Quantization: An Ode to Manfred Krifka—Deedles D’Dee

Book ९४

Study of language, so vast and broad—
Yet there’s a subfield, revealed as a fraud!
Not worthy now of its place in the sun—
Twas once belovèd; ’tis now undone.
All hail the rise of the “newfangled” ways!
marks the spot where that fool held sway.
—Charla González Pérez-Tórrez

I long to see and to read
A tome that fills the field’s need
For voluminous tracts
With syntactical facts
That from linguists’ armchairs proceed.
—Tomé Fairfax

The semantics of noun specificity
Are determined, in part, by factivity,
Plus NEG, singularity
And habituality;
It’s tricky; specific’lly linguistic’lly.
—N. Pee

Now Koine Greek must be your optic
For reading the Gospels synoptic;
But to go non-canonical
Is to go non-Koinonical:
The gospel of Thomas is in Coptic!
—Ptic (& Co.)

Now Philo of Alexandria
Used ‘Logos’, which, scholars make clear,
May have influenced John
(Chapter 1 from verse 1);
But what if he’d* gone for ‘Sophia’?
—Fi Loe

* That is, Philo

To many in our global age,
“Om mani padme hum” is what
Prevails upon the mind from sage
To minion. Our global age
Has learned yet more that’s wise from As-
ia. Hence the cry denied by not
Too many in our global age:
“Yum, mantou pad thai hummus, what!”
—Pumptilian Perniquity

Some phonologists’
Haikus are problematic(-ly)
—Morris Swadesh III

My career choices must be reversed,
Because animal language is cursed.
I’ve tried to learn whale,
But I’m destined to fail
As I’ll never be fully immersed.
—Pete Bleackley

To claim that an entity’s nominal
Begs a subset of questions phenomenal.
If you think verbs are tricky
Or find aspect sticky
You’ll find nominals optimally abominable.
—Noam O’Nall

a refereed study of audibles
do QBs pronounce with strange prosody?
using ToBI transcriptions of oddities
what TBIs do
to guys’ TBUs
is TBAsee Lab Phonology
—Andrew Lamont

/nuz baɪts/
Good Ol’ Quantization: An Ode to Manfred KrifkaDeedles D’Dee
SpecGram Vol CXCII, No 4 Contents