Letters to the Editor SpecGram Vol CLXXXVI, No 1 Contents Linguimericks—Book ६८

/nuz baɪts/

Not a wire news service but still more reliable than most newspapers.

UN Announces New Year for New Year’s

As the International Year of Indigenous Languages draws to a close, the Untied Nations (UN) have announced that 2020 will be the Year of Speaking the Colonizers’ Language. This will mark the first time since 2018 that the languages of the once-dominant European powers have been recognized in an international year, and only the 49th time out of the past 50 years.

Speaking on behalf of the UN, spokesperson Colin Yzerman said, “We have six official languages that collectively are official in more than 100 countries. Come on, everyone, get with the program and speak one of them!” The announcement was met with loud boos from delegates representing both the countries that had escaped colonialism, and the countries whose colonizers’ language is UN-unofficial (including Portugal, the Netherlands, Germany, and, in one case, the Duchy of Courland and Semigallia).

The International Years are not the only linguistics celebrations that the UN recognize. The Untied Nations For Recognizing Education, Science, and Culture, Occasionally (UNFRESCO) each year promotes the International Mother Language Day as well as the International Day of the Father Language That Hasn’t Returned From Getting a Pack of Smokes. For 2020, linguist John McNichols has successfully proposed to get the two back together to designate March 14 as the International Day of Creole Languages. But since this is also the International Day of the Sweet Potato, experts predict that the creole languages will be lost amidst the Pie Day celebrations.

Letters to the Editor
LinguimericksBook ६८
SpecGram Vol CLXXXVI, No 1 Contents