Zamenhof used diacritics,
But the Idists, that sad bunch of critics,
Removed them: kerching!
Then did other odd things—
Now Ido’s just strange hieroglyphics.
—Fi F. Lyons
Why is English so very prolific?
Is it cleaner, more neat, more artistic?
Studies have shown
(So it’s therefore ‘well known’)
It’s because it has no diacritics.
Our script lacks the letters to mark
All our sounds, so we’re left in the dark.
Diacritics we hate:
With regret I must state,
We just should have stuck to fuþark.
If you wish to read Arabic well
You’ll need time to develop the skill;
So start with short texts
Rich in diacritics
Not just i’jam but also tashkil.
—Alfred Lord Deakyson
An acute and a grave met for sex
In a motel on Route 66.
Precautions were taken
But nine short months later:
A bouncing new babe circumflex!
A circumflex met with a caron;
He was Simon and she was called Sharon.
And things did their thing—
Some time later: kerching!
They named their new baby boy Macron.
—Gerard Manley Deakins