A misogynous linguist of yore
Made big headlines like no one before:
Only lads could express
Acquisitional success.
Nae a lass had a say in this lore.
—Cailín na Luimní
Doctor Johnson, as quick as a wink,
To a lady, while out for a drink,
When she said, “Sir, you smell,”
Responded to tell
Her, “No, Madam, you smell—I stink!”
—Pete Bleackley
There once was a phonotactician
Who arranged phones with great erudition,
And the phones that would not
Fit so well in his chart,
He condemned straight to phonoperdition.
—Morris Swadesh III
A calque is a kind of translation,
But calque is a different formation.
It gives me great sorrow
That we had to borrow
The word to describe that relation!
—Chaz Tushka
Optimal schmoptimal
Morphophonologists
Analyze allomorphs’
Forms as derived
Paradigmaticists
Memorize everything
Reduplications are
Simply learned twice
—Andrew Lamont
