Linguistics Nerd Camp—Bethany Carlson SpecGram Vol CLXXI, No 2 Contents The SpecGram Inquisition—Madalena Cruz-Ferreira—with Inquisitor Generalis Jonathan Downie

Book १२

Voulez-vous boire cette eau?
But around nine o’clock
Ich saufe wie ein Loch.
To minnasan nominashou!
—Callum & Tel

On the day I discovered linguistics
I checked out some employment statistics.
I found I’d have to scratch
Living standards to match
Those of other devotional mystics.
—Cailín na Luimní

My hen sang to me this sad song:
“You are dull, and your lectures are long,
And I see from your notes,
That all of your quotes,
From this Chickasaw grammar are wrong.”
—Sheri Wells-Jensen

My Ista complained to my face
“You are a disgrace to your race.
Your Ailurin vowels
Are like long midnight howls,
Your tetraphthongs devoid of all grace.”
—Dr. Whom

There once was a linguist called Noam,
Who declared, “There is no need to roam,
Because UG is king,
So whatever your thing,
You can just do it right here at hoam.”
—Pete Bleackley

There was a young linguist, Ignatius,
Who was known for his manner audacious;
When interviewing for grants
He always wore pants—
But alone in his officeGood Gracious!
—P. Ublekkdeaux Meign

Linguistics Nerd CampBethany Carlson
The SpecGram InquisitionMadalena Cruz-Ferreirawith Inquisitor Generalis Jonathan Downie
SpecGram Vol CLXXI, No 2 Contents